Every parent should take the time to notice and to praise positive behaviors of their kids. Instead of spending so much time scolding and reprimanding them, parents should channel all their efforts into making their kids feel good about themselves. Giving regular praises to your children is a way of teaching them what kind of behaviors you want.
Praise your children at least five times a day. Giving praises only take a few seconds, but the impact that it will have on your child's self esteem and the effect it will have on your relationship with your kids will be overwhelming. You need to regularly encourage and praise your child in order to make her a well rounded adult.
Even for doing the simples of things, see to it that you praise and thank your child for every nice thing they do. Although they might not need as many praises as they grow old, it does not mean that you should stop giving your child praises and appreciation. Especially when your child reaches adolescence, you need to make them feel that they are actually doing something right.
But then again, you should also be careful in praising your kids. You have to properly state your comments in order to avoid commending your child for not doing something bad. You should avoid saying praise statements like "Great job honey, you did not eat junk food today" or "I am very happy that you did not watch too much TV tonight."
These statements can actually confuse your child. When you praise your child for not doing something bad, you are ruining the whole point of the praise. Stating a positive comment this way only weakens the positive emphasis on the good behavior, which can imply that your child's normal behavior is actually worse. Aside from that, by mentioning a bad behavior in the praise, you are giving your child an idea about it.
It is important that you show faith and confidence in whatever your child is doing. Always pay attention in what they say or do and notice every accomplishment they make, no matter how small. Point out developing skills and encourage them to continue doing positive behavior. Be realistic and do not demand perfection. Always remember that kids are not perfect and they need time and practice to do things the proper way.
It will greatly help your child if you always praise her progress, even she still needs to do so much more. Even when your child failed at a certain endeavor, still give her praise for her efforts and for getting that far. Always give your child hope but emphasize the value of hard work.
But most importantly, you have to avoid using negative terms of discouragement. Never overgeneralize things by using words like always, anything, everyone, never, and so on. Using negative terms and overgeneralizing only build poor self esteem. A child who hears such words too often will likely ignore their value.
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