An Exercise in Advertising by LeAnn R. Ralph copyright: LeAnn R.
Ralph 2006
I recently read an article about writing "ad copy" for your
website. According to the author of the article, to achieve
maximum success and to generate sales beyond your wildest
dreams, you should use certain words in your ad copy that will
compel people to buy your product or service. So I decided to
give it a try. . .
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If you want to satisfy your curiosity about what it was
like to grow up on a farm, read my books (Christmas in
Dairyland (True Stories from a Wisconsin Farm) -- Give
Me a Home Where the Dairy Cows Roam -- and Cream of the
Crop (More True Stories from a Wisconsin Farm). Reading my
books will help you exhibit your patriotism because what
can be more patriotic than something All-American like a farm
--- and like reading, for that matter?
Reading my books will also help cure your shyness about
reading, if you feel shy about reading, because the stories are
complete in and of themselves. You will definitely feel a sense
of pride when you have successfully read all three books
and have purchased a couple of dozen copies to give to your
friends and relatives, who will be delighted with the
surprise gift that they were not expecting.
Reading my books will cure your exhaustion after a hard
day of work, too, because they are well-written and fun to read.
The books also will restore your sense of optimism about
the state of literature. My books do not contain any references
to lust (except maybe if I mention the bull as he gazes
longingly at the cows in the pasture). My books will also cure
any sense of indifference or insecurity or
sadness or anger or disgust or
loneliness you might feel about the world -- or about
reading books -- and they will ignite your passion for
reading again.
Also, if you purchase copies of my books, you will be the
envy of all of your friends and relatives, because you
will have copies and they don't. At least, they won't have any
copies until you -- with your strong sense of
-- buy several hundred copies of each book to give away.
My books will also alleviate that sense of guilt you have
been feeling because you do not have a gift to show your
appreciation for someone's contribution to society (the
mail carrier; the clerk at the grocery store; the teller at the
bank; your doctor; your dentist; your oral hygienist).
To avoid confusion and to boost your happiness,
confidence and wit buy all of my books today!
*********
See now? Wasn't that fun? And don't you feel like buying a book?
Right.
************************************* LeAnn R. Ralph is the
author of the books "Cream of the Crop (More True Stories from
Wisconsin Farm)" (trade paperback, Sept. 2005); "Christmas in
Dairyland (True Stories from a Wisconsin Farm" (trade paperback
2003); "Give Me a Home Where the Dairy Cows Roam" (trade
paperback 2004); "Preserve Your Family History (A Step-by-Step
Guide for Interviewing Family Members and Writing Oral
Histories" (e-book 2004). You are invited to read sample
chapters, order books and sign up for the free newsletter, Rural
Route 2 News -- http://ruralroute2.com
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