"I don't let my mouth say nothin' my head can't stand." Louis
Armstrong
Since the 1970's, learning how to communicate better has had a
lot to do with understanding body language.
Julius Fast wrote a book entitled, Body Language in 1970. He
talked about a new science called Kinesics. It opened the way to
more studies and books on the subjects. Today, the term Body
Language is very common and understood as an important element
of communication.
In fact, experts in the field of communication suggest that
there is a rule that says that 7% of the meaning of what a
person is saying comes from their words.
Interestingly, 38% is based on the tone of their voice. 55% of
the meaning comes from the body language of the person that is
speaking. This rule comes from research that was published in
the late 1960's.
Some now think that the percentages from this research might be
slightly different. Nevertheless, the bottom line is still the
same. If you don't know the basics of body language, you are
missing a valuable tool for learning how to communicate better.
We speak body language on a subliminal level, without actually
realizing that we are communicating through body talk.
1. Face
The most expressive part of your body is your face. When you
enter a room if you feel nervous, your expression might make you
look aloof or unfriendly.
Smiling at the room is a sure-fire way to remove anyone's doubts
about your approachability. Smiling makes us look warm, open and
confident.
2. Eyes
They say the eyes are the windows to the soul. They certainly
give people clues about what we are feeling.
A direct gaze towards someone can show interest- direct staring
on the other hand can mean an intense dislike. Very little eye
contact can show that you are shy.
3. Hands
Have you ever watched someone's hand gestures when they are
talking? Open hand gestures tend to make a person appear open
and honest. Bringing hands together to a point can accent the
point you are making.
Wringing your hands or excessively moving your fingers and hands
will give away nervousness. It can even make someone look
dishonest- are they trying to hide something?
4. Posture
If you lean towards someone you are showing an interest in that
person. If we are feeling low in confidence, we tend to slouch
our shoulders and look down.
Men and women use different body language. For instance, women
will stand close to each other, hold eye contact with the person
they are talking to and use gestures.
Men make little effort to maintain eye contact and don't rely on
the use of gestures to communicate. Men and women can learn how
to communicate better by observing the differences in their use
of body language.
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